Internet, I cannot convey to you the utter joy I feel when I realize that I have made it through one of the most difficult, yet rewarding years of my life. I know that statement rings a tad hyperbolic, but it is true. I love my job and I love going to work each day, but this year, while wonderfully rewarding, has been the most stressful year of my life. I am glad to say that, by next Friday afternoon, I will have survived my first year of teaching.
I have survived the many mood swings projected upon me by my ever-changing adolescent students. I have survived teaching 15 novels, 7 plays, 4 research projects, 3 poetry units, 3 short stories units, 11 Psychology units, and countless writing assignments. I have survived 5 a.m. mornings and 12 a.m. bed times. I have survived hour long commutes. I have survived moments of despair and tears. I have survived moments of elation and joy. I have survived chaperoning dances and a senior trip.
I have survived and I did not do it by myself. I had the support of my family, my friends, my husband, my colleagues. I had the guidance of veteran teachers. I have had the support of my Heavenly Father who let me cry out to Him and plead with Him and yell at Him and question Him.
This year has been quite the paradoxical year. I feel I have been hardened and softened; I have grown more confident yet have never felt less self-assured. I have never felt so sad and, yet, so happy. I felt completely supported and completely alone. It has been a tremulous year of ups and downs...
and I would not go back and change a thing.
"Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good
we oft might win, by fearing to attempt".